Advice on Girls

I’m unpopular with girls in my school

Posted on 16. Mar, 2009 by Michael in Increase Your Confidence, Relationship Advice

Aidan needs advice about girls in his school. He also needs a shot of self-esteem. A lot of us guys have been in similar situations before. Read Aidan’s question and offer your advice to help him out!

Reader Question:

Dear Advice On Girls,

I really like this girl, I’ve liked her for about 6 months now. I’m quite unpopular with the girls at my school and all of the attractive girls seem to be kind of embarrassed to be seen with me. This one girl was from a different school though. She and I became really really close - we kised once on the lips in a game of truth or dare. I asked her out and she said I think we should leave it for awhile saying, “I’m not really over my old boyfriend.” Then she met this guy and within two weeks of meeting him they started dating.

Her new boyfriend started rubbing it in and being really harsh to me. Then everyone told her he was rubbing it in and she broke off all connections with him and said she was really sorry and that she didn’t know he was like that.

Now she’s saying to all my friends that I dont have a chance and she’s trying to distance herself from me to try and get me over her. My bands doing a gig and shes going, I was thinking if the gig went well then maybe I could ask for a word afterwards. Would that work? I would like to become quite close with her again but I don’t really know how. I just really need help. What do I do? I’ve never really liked anyone near as much as I like her. I’m really scared I’ve mucked it up - 6 months of being her best friend followed by rejection. Is there any hope?

Our Answer:

Hi Aidan,

I’m sorry to hear about your situation. I know you must feel hurt and for that I am truly sorry.

If she has told your friends that she isn’t interested, that’s a clear sign that you should move on. I know you like her a lot but, for your own good, you need to let go of this crush.

Also, I would not pull her aside after the concert. That might make the situation more uncomfortable. Just let things play out naturally. Don’t feel like you have to save the friendship. Things between you and her will return to normal with time. I know it’s hard but you just have to be patient.

There will be other girls that you feel just as strongly for. And they’ll feel just as strongly for you. In the long run, it doesn’t matter if you’re unpopular. These high school clicks will end when you graduate and go to college. You’ll be able to meet more people who think like you and will accept you for who you are.

You also mention that you are “unattractive.” Sounds to me like you need to boost you confidence. But, for the sake of argument, let’s assume you are not the best looking guy around. It really doesn’t matter that much. In college, I’ve seen some really unattractive and overweight guys date really hot girls. These hot girls date these guy because of their fun personalities and sense of humor.

So to sum up, let go of your crush on this girl. There will be others. And don’t sell yourself short. Hold your head up high man. You have a lot to be proud and confident about! Don’t let anyone tell you different.

Best of luck Aidan!

Tags: How to tell if a girl likes you, Questions & Answers