Phone Flirting Tips
Posted on 08. Feb, 2009 by Michael in Flirting Tips, Relationship Advice
Reader Question:
Hi,
I’m 15 and I like this girl. She likes me back as well and now i’m going out with her. But I’m afraid i’m going to loose her because I’m not very good at flirting and making conversations.
Can you please help me with some flirting tips and conversation starters I can use on the phone or at school?
From Ankush, a reader
Answer:
Hi Ankush,
Keep in mind that the hard part is over. You got the girl and she’s obviously into you or she wouldn’t go out with you. So during your conversations remain calm and don’t get nervous. Girls can sense when guys are nervous.
Starting a conversation over the phone isn’t that different from starting one in person. Ask the girl how her day went. If she goes to school, ask her if her if anything interesting happened in her classes. Is there a teacher or professor that she really likes? Ask her and then ask what does she like or dislike about them.
As far as flirting over the phone, that can be a little more difficult than flirting in person. Or, depending on the way you look at it, it can be easier. My advice is to focus on being funny or humorous. All girls love to laugh. Also, every so often during the conversation, tell her that you think she’s pretty or that she looked really beautiful when you saw her earlier in the day. You can also comment on how much fun you have with her when the both of you hangout together.
Just be sure that you have a comfortable enough relationship when you flirt over the phone. That means if this is the first or second phone conversation you’ve had with her, skip the flirting for now. Just focus on having a fun phone call with your girl.
Just play it cool and the conversation will take off before you know it!
Best of luck Ankush!
Michael, Founder of Advice on Girls

Shy to Talk, a fan of AdviceOnGirls.com
Ty
10. Feb, 2009
A suggestion for you. I think a post with more phone flirting advice would be really helpful for my situation.
Darrell
11. Feb, 2009
You should ask her about her favorite tv shows like Gossip Girl or the Bachelor. Girls go on and on about those shows…
Tim
13. Feb, 2009
Confidence!
I agree, flirting over the phone is a bit different than in person. In person, we have our non-verbal body language to rely on. A study done by UCLA proved that 93% of communication effectiveness is determined by nonverbal cues. Another study showed that the impact left by your interaction was determined 7 percent by the words you use, 38 percent by quality of your voice (confidence, stutter, slur speech, etc), and 55 percent by the non-verbal communication.
What all this means is that the vast majority of what you flirt with is things that you can’t express verbally. When you start flirting on the phone, you essentially are removing your most effective tool. With this in mind, it’s important that you choose your words carefully and sound relaxed and confident. This is all the person on the other end has to go on.
Michael
13. Feb, 2009
Really excellent advice Tim! Thanks for sharing.
Kad
14. Feb, 2009
Tell da girl how long u have liked her n how much u did b4 u actually got da courage to ask her out. Always works.. N tell her things dat made u like her. She will think ur sensitive! N also enjoy talking to her.. Dat will keep her interested!
Joe
17. Mar, 2009
Kad you are writing on a keyboard, it is totally unnecessary for you to tak like DAT (note the lack of a th)
surya
10. Apr, 2009
confidence holds the key. just never blabber while talking. talk fluently, make the conversation more interesting with each advancing statement.
Michael
10. Apr, 2009
@ Surya
Good points. But I would recommend to not stress to much. The key is to have fun. That’s the most attractive thing to a girl.
kristi
08. May, 2009
It is easy to get nervous on the phone, especially when it is someone you want to impress/tease/entice. You talk and think too fast. So practicce this a little before you use it, but….
Talk slowly and clearly, taking time to pronounce your words. By slowing down a tiny bit ( not too much or you’ll sound like you are stoned), you have extra time to think about how you say stuff, and how you want to reply.
It can give your voice a much bigger impact, remember, on the phone it is more of how you say it than what you say.
An old actor’s trick is to practice talking with a pencil between your teeth you have to slow down and enunciate better, and this sounds great on the other end of the phone.
You sound more relaxed, and when you speak well you show good manners, which is very sexy and flirty: it shows respect for the person you are talking to.
If this sounds corny, think of it this way: would you use bad manners with someone you were flirting with and wanted to impress? No. You might be naughty, but NOT sow bad manners.
Rememeber, practice (with a friend if possible), have fun, and also be careful because good flirting can evoke strong emotions!
Michael
09. May, 2009
@ Kristi
That’s some mighty good advice! Thanks for sharing.
Kennedy
09. May, 2009
kristi is on to something there fellas. How many hollywood heart-throbs do you know that talk really fast and high pitched?
All of those leading men that women go bonkers for have that same low, deliberate voice that shows the speaker knows what he’s talking about.
The trick I used to was to listen to the radio in the car. I would try and repeat whatever the DJ said in a slower, lower voice. With enough practice and it becomes second nature.
Thanks for the good words kristi!
deepak
16. May, 2009
i love her & i am talking to her on phone daily & she act me as only friend .she know about my x-girl friend .now tell me how i talk to her on phone.
Michael
16. May, 2009
@ Deepak
If she only likes you as a friend, then you should show her there’s something more to you. As stated above, entertain her while she’s on the phone. You can do that by either making her laugh or having a meaningful conversation with her. You can also do both.
PAPI CHULO
18. May, 2009
Hello everyone!..
i just met a girl and i am talking to her over the phone but i run out of things to say, i noticed that she is the one that does most of the talking and keeps the conversation alive.. she calls me everyday and texts me but i just run out of things to say…
Any help would be greatly appreciated!!
Michael
19. May, 2009
@ Papi
The next time you run out of things to talk about, just refocus the conversation back on her. You can do this by asking her some open-ended questions. That’s usually the easiest thing to do.
Also, you can always end the conversation when you run out of topics. Just be nice about it and say, “Well, I’ve had a lot of fun talking with you. I definitely want to speak with you again tomorrow but right now I’ve got to go.”
Charle
23. Nov, 2009
hello again. It’s me Charle. Same problem. Girl named Kayla. Super hot. Semester is about to end. Sadly, I won’t see her very much after this semester. We don’t ever talk/see each other outside of class. I want to somehow keep in touch with her because she is a pretty cool girl and I wouldn’t mind her being my friend. Only problem is my days are numbered. Should I try to move on or get her number? I don’t know if it’s too soon to get her number/if she has a boyfriend, so I don’t want to screw up whatever good reputation I have with her.
HELP!
Sandy
29. Dec, 2009
So I liked this guy for a long time but I didn’t think that we could connect because he didn’t have anthing to say when we would text. So I came up with this game and he started to get more comfortable around me. The game goes like this. Person one asks a question to person two. Person two answers the question and then says ‘you?’ Person one will then answer the question that they asked. Then the process starts over again except this time person two asks the question. This game helps you to get to know someone and open up. Good Luck
David
16. Feb, 2010
I really like this girl, but im not sure how to get to know if she likes me back. We talk pretty much every day and were very close. We know practically everything about each other and i want to tell her that i like her, but i don’t want to get rejected. Can you tell me some body language, or things she might do to give away if she likes me or not?
Thanks!
mike
09. Mar, 2010
good advice she liked it
Babu
10. Apr, 2010
hi, this is Babu. I met a girl at my office and she’s super cute. I really want to talk to her and the only way of talking to her is phone conversation. She likes me quite well but only as a colleague. So, I want all of your advice about how can I call her everyday without keeping her feeling odd. and most importantly, how should I start the conversation and give a subtle message that I like her? help!
Kennedy
13. Apr, 2010
@ Babu
I wouldn’t increase the frequency of your phone calls, just try to get more out of each call. Just throw a few open ended questions in with each call. What are you doing this weekend? What did you do last weekend? How is it going over in your department today? Add a little personal touch to each phone call and it will make it easier for her to open up so you can one day ask her out!
Kyle
04. Aug, 2010
Ok, all I really wanna know is…
What are some non-basic giveaways to a girl-
-liking you?
-Wanting to hangout