How to know if she wants you to kiss her

Posted on 28. Aug, 2007 by Michael in Dating Tips

Knowing when to kiss a girl and when not to kiss a girl can make or break a potential relationship. Many guys just don’t know when they should lean in for that first kiss. We think, “Does she want me to kiss her? Will she be offended if I tried? Will she knee me in the junk if I went for a kiss?” Well there’s one sure giveaway that will tell you that she wants you to kiss her. I call it the “look.”

The look is usually brief, subtle, and very simple. She simply shifts her eyes from yours and looks at your mouth for a split second then looks back at you. That is a sure sign she wants to kiss you. It’s as simple as that.

When she looks at your mouth she’s giving you an unconscious signal (body language) that she wants to kiss you. Subconsciously, she’s imagining what it’s like to kiss you. So when you’re out on that next date pay close attention to her, especially when you’re saying goodnight, and watch for the look.

165 Responses to “How to know if she wants you to kiss her”

Michael

07. Jul, 2009

@ NeedsHelpWithGirls

It sounds like you’re ready to fly on your own! Seriously, you know what to do. Just do more of the same stuff you did when you talked with her previously. Relax and be yourself. You’ll do fine, I’m sure of it!

Also, to get a custom picture on the site, visit Gravatar.com.
Michael

07. Jul, 2009

@ Memo
Sounds like you might be too quiet for your own good. You mention that you’re afraid to talk because you think you might say something stupid and cause her to leave you. Well, I can guarantee that if you continue to do what you’ve been doing you WILL lose her. So it’s time to change strategies.
Become more courageous and just speak what’s on your mind. Tell her about the stuff your into and your hobbies. Let her inside your mind. That way she can get to know you better and connect with you. When she does, more than likely she’ll realize what a unique boyfriend she has and that she wants to stay with you.
Also, whenever she’s talking with you, you’ve got to pay attention to what she says. Ask her questions that relate to the topic she’s speaking to you. Don’t just sit there and simply say words like “okay” or “really?” Participate in the conversation.
Good luck Memo!
brandon

25. Jul, 2009

i agree with the whole… if she looks at your lips thing. take it from someone who has experienced it himself… but i find it troubling…
i just graduated hs and theres this girl i think about a lot… but she had a bf… but i remember almost all our conversations, she looked at my lips and when she shifted stance she seemed…. unfocused. does this mean she wanted to? or am i simply crazy?
Michael

26. Jul, 2009

@ Brandon
It’s hard to say. You need to pay special attention to her body language. Was she leaning in close to you? Was she subtly licking her lips? Where the both of you flirting with each other? If so, she might have wanted you to kiss her.
Next time, be sure to look for the subtle cues.
harry

25. Sep, 2009

Please please please help me i am in year 7 and really love this girl but dnt now how to tell her please help me
Michael

26. Sep, 2009

@ Harry
First, calm down. Don’t tell her that you “love” her. That will scare her off. Besides, you really don’t love her. You’re simply infatuated with her – there’s a BIG difference. Love is something that gets built over time when two people are in a relationship.
The best way to approach your situation is to talk with her. Don’t start the conversation off by saying that you “really, really like her.” Just be friendly and talk with her as an equal. This gives her the chance to get to know how great you are. It also gives you the chance to see if you really like her personality.
Good luck Harry!
cal

09. Oct, 2009

hi guys,
theres this girl in my class who i sit next to and we get along really well, she mucks about with me and all that. I would like to ask her out but I cant tell if its too soon or not and if she would want to go out or just stay friends.
Zach

10. Oct, 2009

There is this girl and we went to a dance adn we danced together and held hands a hugged a lot I was going to kiss her goodnight but i didn’t know if she wanted me too or not. Advice? she also said she loved me
Zach

10. Oct, 2009

There is this girl and we went to a dance adn we danced together and held hands a hugged a lot I was going to kiss her goodnight but i didn’t know if she was ready too or not. Advice? she also said she loved me
Rue

15. Oct, 2009

@ Zach

Umm i dont think you should repost your stuff cuz someone will get to u .
so if she said she loved you just go for a kiss but like hug and hold her first and just a tap man
Kennedy

22. Oct, 2009

@ cal

It’s never too soon to ask a girl out! Just remember to keep it simple – go for coffee after school, or to study one night for a test, or to go with her to the basketball game coming up. If you keep it simple, it takes some of the pressure off her to accept your offer. You can do it!
Kennedy

22. Oct, 2009

@ Zach

The “love” thing seems to have come out of nowhere there, but normally if things are going really well there is nothing wrong with finishing the night off with a kiss. Just remember to take a deep breath and go for it. It seems like from your description that she was practically begging for you to kiss her. Time to go out there and finish the job!
josh

17. Nov, 2009

hi am 20 and i have a friend whos 17 and i realy like her we did not see each other for a while and we meet up on saturday for a drink and then we went to her houes and spent loads of time time 3hours and then i went home she lean on the door and say goodbye and i had fun. i felt like i should of kissed her? but i was not 100% sure. then i text her on monday and said do u fancy a coffee becuse she works from home and she said yer mite me at 12 30 so i went round and we talk for a long time again 3hours again. then she said she had to get back to work so i walk out the door and she stood there and we talk for about 20mins i feel she want a kiss again but i don’t want to me rejected bye her. what should i do?
jack

06. Dec, 2009

i am in 13years old going to be 14 on january and i like this girl shes 1 year older than me and i dont know if i should make a move or not , and can u tell me what to do on my frist date?
Jack

06. Dec, 2009

Hey, i’m 14 and i’m in year 10. I’ve liked this girl since year seven and she had a boyfriend, she broke up with him in year 9 at the end of the year and cried for ages. When ever i see her i get butterflies and can never muster enough strength to talk to her. I would like it if you could give me tips, or techniques to control my fear.
Davidj

12. Dec, 2009

im fallin 4 dis girl i work wit & idk wot 2 do evry time we talk about sumtin idk wot 2 say r i think of sumtin & it dusnt last long
Edgardo

20. Dec, 2009

Ok i like this girl and she is 2 years older than me and i like her alot we been talkin since october and we get along well but im not sure wat to do i get butterflies and dont kno wat to say it makes me feel like an idiot
Greg

22. Dec, 2009

There is a girl who I am totally in love with, but I don’t know if she even likes me back. What would I say to ask this? Because “Hey, I really like you do you like me?” seems way too forward and would make it awkward. How would I tell her that I really like her? What exact words would I use? I have no idea. Lots of people think that I like her, but she’s never questioned it.

I want to know how she feels too, but I don’t know how to ask.
Zack

26. Dec, 2009

I’m 13yrs old and I finally got thecourage to ask this hot chick out and the date went great. All her friends say me and her are a cute couple but her friends said that I should kiss the girl on the next date, so wish me luck and can u give some tips if have any I really need them thnx
Matt

03. Jan, 2010

@ Greg, what you could do to see if she likes you is if you two are in a hallway or somewhere with people, lean in and say “Hey (insert girls name here) my friend over there (point at some guy in the distance) wants to find out if you like me.” its not too direct and wouldn’t be awkward. There is little chance that she would lie to you if you say that. Good luck!
warren

20. Feb, 2010

idont know if i posted my comment or not
warren

20. Feb, 2010

well me and this girl always knuckle touch and talk and laugh like were normal friends and i cant seem to summon up the courage to ask her out……..
Raynes

20. Feb, 2010

First off, u guys give some kick-ass advice. Thx a bunch. There’s this girl in my class. We hit it off instantly nd became great friends. We told each other everything and I was always there for her. We spent a lot of time together. After about 3 weeks I told her I liked her and she told me she had to think about it. She gave me excuses like,”I don’t date right now.” Nd later she said she didn’t like me in that way. Not long after this, I hear she made with some guy she hardly ever spoke to. When I asked her about it, she said it was just a school fling, nothing serious. Normally, I’d walk away,but the way we interact isn’t in the way friends do. We hug real passiontely, she leant on my shoulder at some point in class and she talks like there’s still hope for us in the future. Our conversations always end up in long term goals like marrige… She’s not exactly the hottest girl out there, there are plenty around, but I think I’ve fallen in love with who she is. When I ask her how she feels about me, she seems confused. She says its a no to a relationship with me right now, but not a no to me. I recently asked her if I should just move on and she said,” I think I want u to.” Her words said one thing but her face and the way she said she didn’t want to lose me. She’s been hurt by the last guys she got serious with and its like she wants me to prove I’m really into her. Her boyfriend feels threatened becoz we don’t act like friends and wants limitations. I told her I can’t do that and that if she wanted I cud back off. But she instantly pleaded with me not to and I cud tell it was sincere. I really think I love this girl but she’s giving me mixed signals and I don’t know if I can just sit and watch her making out with another guy anymore. This whole thing’s messing my life up. I’ve tried to see her as a friend but I can’t. What should I do?
Kennedy

21. Feb, 2010

@ josh

Dude. She’s totally waiting for you to kiss her. Do it already.
Kennedy

21. Feb, 2010

@ jack

Just be confident! Remember to use open ended questions to keep the conversation going. Ask her about HER. What she likes, favorite movies and tv shows, favorite foods, family, that kind of stuff. It’s that easy man – good luck!
Kennedy

21. Feb, 2010

@ warren

That can be a tough spot. You might be in the “Friend Zone”. Try asking her out to something a little more intimate – like dinner and a movie. See if she warms up to you a little bit, rather than being another goofy buddy. Careful about asking her about dating though, if she thinks you guys are just friends it could easily strain the relationship you already have.
Good luck to you man!
Kennedy

21. Feb, 2010

@ Raynes

Thanks for the good words! We always enjoy getting feedback from you guys.
Now onto your issue. You are not going to want to hear this, but it looks like she sees you solely as one of her best friends. And it also seems like she is stringing you along knowing how you feel about her.
If this is really starting to mess with your head, it’s time you put some distance in between you and this girl. If she truly has some inner feelings for you, then this type of move usually will get these feelings to surface. Otherwise she’s just playing you, and that’s being terribly selfish on her part. Try taking a week and just hanging out with other friends, and cutting back on texts or emails you send to her, and see how she reacts. It’s going to be super hard, but it’s going to pay off for you in the end, no matter which way this ends up. You can do it!
Raynes

26. Feb, 2010

Thanks Kennedy. I kinda of knew this was what I had to do ,but you gave me the push I needed. Thanks for being straight up with me and getting me out of a tight spot. Once again spectacular job u guys!!
cameron

03. Apr, 2010

im 13 and i really like this single girl in my year but i dont think she likes me. have yougot a line i could use to ask her to go out with me or do u have any advuce at all that you could give me to approach her
Cameron

03. Apr, 2010

To Raynes-

Bro that totally does suck, and I was in a situation kind of similar to yours about a month ago only I didn’t have as much passion as you do for this girl. And yes, she also has a boyfriend after she told me she liked me and all that stuff. My friend kept telling me that she was just keeping me on the side to make her feel better while she was upset with her boyfriend or whatever. I heard him… but i didn’t listen. The whole situation ended up being a waste of my time. It is hard to believe I know, but I think you would be better off moving on. The way I moved on was I found another girl I liked. It was like I was finially released from the web the other girl had me in. So it made things a lot easier to let go rather than being totally hurt in the end. But me and that girl are still friends and we still text on most days and she STILL tries to flirt with me but now it is a whole lot easier to resist flirting back so I’m not hurt Listen to Kennedy man, you and I both know he knows his stuff. good luck

P.S. I’m the 15 year old Cameron. Not the 13 year old one above.
Kennedy

13. Apr, 2010

@ cameron

Find something you guys have in common. Do you take the same classes? Do you have mutual friends? Have you seen her out and about somewhere? You can take even the smallest thing in common and turn it into a conversation starter. Just remember to take a deep breath and go for it!
Drew

21. Apr, 2010

Hey I’m 16 years old and I’ve been with this girl for almost eight months, and everything is going really well. I’m just wondering how she feels. We don’t kiss much, so I’m kind of worried about how she feels about me. She is a shy girl, not the type that will just tell you how she feels. I have taken a lot of time to get to know her and get close to her, but sometimes I can’t tell how things are going. She never tells me how she feels about me. I tell her how amazing she is, and how much she means to me. I’m just wondering why isn’t she more open with her feelings. I know how I feel and I tell her because I love the way she makes me feel. Sometimes I wish I could know what’s going on in her head. I feel like she might not be totally content with me when she doesn’t tell me how I make her feel. She is becoming more affectionate with me but she never talks about how she feels, this just makes me worry a little and wonder if I’m doing anything wrong. Is there anything way I can tell what she is feeling? How can I really turn her on and make her open up to me. She’s my everything, and all advice would help and be greatly appreciated.
francis

22. Apr, 2010

girls keep thinking im gay because i dont have a deep voice for someone my age i try to flurt but it doesnt seem to work help? they seem to brush it off likes its nothing
Kennedy

03. May, 2010

@ Drew

One solution might be to tune down the affection a little. Some girls don’t respond well to massive amounts of compliments and affection after such a short period of time, so try and scale it back a little and see how it goes. You might be surprised with how she responds…
Kennedy

03. May, 2010

@ francis

Don’t worry, buddy. Wanna hear something funny? My feet were really small when I started high school. Girls made fun of me too. But after the first summer of high school I hit a growth spurt and everything worked itself out. I now wear a very respectable size 11.
Your voice may get deeper, it may not. Either way, you don’t want to be messing with girls who say that about you anyway. Keep your chin up, and you’ll end up with a girl that’s miles ahead of any of those girls. Trust me.
Dylan

13. May, 2010

Ok this is nice and simple for the teens if u hav her #txt her and start a com and say hey i have somthing to tell u then say i realy wanted to do this in person but i am speach less every time i see u and cant get the words out I realy like u and i was wondering if u would like to go do somthing

this works becuase the girl is flatered by u saying u are speach less and most girls like a shiy guy and love that in a guy no girl like a compleatly ballzy guy dont get me wroung dont be a big girly girl or any thing ex:if u dont like (afriad)of horrier movie tell her she will like that u are honist
John

16. May, 2010

ok so I like this one girl, but I’m not sure if she likes me or not. Sometimes it seems like she’s flirting with me, but then again it looks like she’s flirting with a lot of guys in my grade. How do I know if she likes me or is just being “friendly”?
JR

18. May, 2010

so i been best friends with this girl for about 7 months now. I have been trying to get with her but what ever i do it doesnt work. She told my mom it might mess up our friendship but she flirts all the time. what should i do? i feel as if to much time is spent with her and i get no play. should i dump her and go on the search?
Kennedy

21. May, 2010

@ John

Hmm, sounds like she’s casting a lot of lines. You might want to ask some of her friends how she feels about you. If you get some positive feedback, then try ramping up the flirting a little more to see if she responds…
Kennedy

21. May, 2010

@ JR

You answered your question in the first five words – “best friends.” Sounds like she sees you as just that, a best friend. I wouldn’t pursue a relationship, but I wouldn’t blow up that friendship either. Move on without becoming a jerk to the girl.
hey

22. May, 2010

ummm i had sex with a girl yesterday so now wat do i do?
Jake

17. Jun, 2010

oK…we got into this fight and she looked so pissed at me but it just seemed as if she wanted me to make it all ryt!! its da holz now nd i havent heard 4rm ha… da dae afta da fyt she pointd me out 2 ha fwendz n sed “agh diz boy” wit ha “make me feel betta” voice… afta dat she completely ignord me so i did it 2…. wen da holz finish i dnt knw wat 2 do!!!! i wanna go up 2 ha n kiss ha bt shud i??? help!!!
Name (required)

23. Jun, 2010

hi jake! sometimes to talk things with someone really helps. communication solves most of the problems sometimes
Amer Ganan

29. Jun, 2010

But what if the girl don’t know how to do a frensh kiss
Hakeem

10. Jul, 2010

There’s a girl that I like at my church.I am 17 and she’s 16.I think that she really likes me.I’v been talking to her for 6 months now going on 7 months because I first talked to her in January.She gives me lots of signs of hr liking me.She starts conversations with me all of the time by chatting with me on facebook and just this tuesday that passed,she texted me.Other signs were her putting her head on my chest and calling me her bestfriend.She even told one of our friends that I was her facebook buddy.I told her that her hair looked nice,I saw that she was blushing.She was in a relationship two months afterwards but broke up with him.Ever since that happened she has been more open to me.Ever since she broke up with him,she started texting me.She said that meandher could be camp buddies soon and I asked her to sit next tome on the bus.She said “yeah,definitely.”I also bought her a birthday card for her birthday,she was really happy.She gave me a tight hug,I gave her a tight hug back,and she said thank you.Just to let you know,I am black and she’s white.My question is are these good signs and are these possibilities of her wanting togo out with me.
Kennedy

13. Jul, 2010

Dude, that sounds great! I recommend trying to see if she’s interested in taking it further. Ask her if you can take her to a movie sometime before summer is up.
Try the drive-in if you have one in the area, girls like that. If she is not a movie person, see if she’s up for getting something to eat some time. If you keep it simple, she is more apt to go for it. You can do it!
Kennedy

13. Jul, 2010

@ Amer

Have some patience, my friend. The next time you go in for that type of kiss, just be sure to go slow and take your time. That makes it easier for her to take cues from what you are doing.
craig

14. Jul, 2010

Theres this girl I like that moved here last yr and she has a twin. Shes 17 almost 18 and Im 20. She started texting me on Thanksgiving Day 09 and we slowly started hanging out and texting more. My best friend started hanging out with me and her and he started talking to the other twin and before we knew it all 4 of us were hanging out and doing stuff together all the time. But before any of this happened I found out she has a boyfriend from where she used to live and thats 3 hrs away. I wouldnt call him the best looking guy in anyway if you get what I mean but they still see each other when they can. Ive talked to her about it and she said she likes me alot and likes hanging out and being around me. She usually text me like crazy and flirts with me. all my friends say I need to make a move if Im gunna have a shot with her cause weve been hanging out and just hugging for the past 7 months and but Ive never kissed a girl or anything and idk when to. I just want her to know how much I like her. I think she has kind of gave up a little and thinks Im never gunna try anything and shes been so busy this summer with basketball tournaments, cheerleading camp, church camp and vacation we hardly get to see each other as much anymore but we are suppose to hangout when she gets back and Im thinking about making a move when I drop her off. What do think I should do??
craig

14. Jul, 2010

Didnt know if I should tell you this but I think I should tell you everything to get the best advice. Shes a big time tease but a good girl. I recently found out that her and my best friend started talking, idk how it started but they ended up seeing each other for a few weeks behind my back and made out and stuff. I was pissed when they found out that I found out that both split up and they felt horrible and she started blowing my phone up trying to get good with me again. we talked about it and we’re cool now and Ive forgave both of em but me and my best friend dont hang out and anymore and we’ll never be the same. After all this happened I told her how much I liked her and she said she couldnt ever tell that I did. Im guessing that means I need to make a move and soon because this probably never would have happened if I would have by now. All Im hoping for is to get a kiss and let her know that if we’re going to keep doing this, then you cant see your old bf anymore and if she sticks with him then its cool with Ill move on but it will be hard. Sorry so long, I just need some advice.
Kennedy

14. Jul, 2010

@ Craig

Tough break man! See if you can get her out on a nice date – just the two of you. Make it dinner and a movie if you can’t come up with anything else. Get a feel for how the evening is going. If at the end of the night you feel like things have been going great, then make a move! Try giving her a kiss before you get out of the car.
I know you can do it man, just remember to take a deep breath!

Advice on Girls

How to know if she wants you to kiss her

165 Responses to “How to know if she wants you to kiss her”

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